My husband and I were
there…again. Our once passionate
relationship slowly eroded into a business partnership…again.
And, this wasn’t the first time
that we’d been “there”.
As devoted parents, volunteers,
employees, kids, friends, etc…the hustle and bustle we allowed in our lives
made us passing ships in the night.
I woke early one Saturday
morning to meet some girlfriends for breakfast. My husband heard me and said, “Good morning.” I returned the “Good morning” and went
to shower.
Once in the shower I thought, “When did we stop kissing each other first
thing in the morning?”
The following morning I woke
early, just cause. Dave heard me
slide out of bed and again gave his, “Good morning.” I returned his “Good morning” and walked over to his side of
the bed to give him a good morning kiss.
About an hour later, Dave came
downstairs and asked, “Have you had your coffee yet?” “Nope, not yet”.
Less than a minute later my coffee was delivered to me, in my favorite
pink Minnie Mouse cup that says, “Mornings Aren’t Pretty!” with just the right
splash of milk to make my morning java the color that I like it.
It may seem like nothing or
insignificant to you.
Romans 12:9a (New International
Version) says that, “love must be sincere”.
My husbands’ love language is
physical touch. My kissing him
spoke more than just the kiss, it spoke love. My love language is coffee. Alright, that love language doesn’t fall neatly under one of
Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages,
but I do sincerely love coffee. My
smooth operator knows just how to love on his honey.
What you just read above were two
people fighting for their marriage.
Fighting for love and passion and running from just a business
partnership.
The philosophical question of
“What came first, the chicken or the egg?” applied here. I figured the chicken…so over chicken
little went to kiss him good morning.
Doing the math, I see that
small gestures add up to big love.
One kiss + One cup of coffee = Two=gether
Small gestures forgotten subtract
from love.
I remember the day when I’d
gussy up for my then boyfriend and somehow, someway…I’d gotten comfortable. Bed head, sweats and lacking morning
kisses took away from the love that I still felt towards my husband.
I remember the day my husband
would go way out of his way to plan a date and somehow, someway…he’d gotten
comfortable. Forgetting to get my
door or bring me or a cup of coffee.
I’ve come to realize that it doesn’t
have to be big gestures. One
kiss. One cup of coffee. Helps keep us two-gether.
How do we avoid the gentle
erosion of our marriage?
One kiss at a time.
One coffee cup at a time.
By letting the small gestures
add up.
The following month we decided
to get just plum crazy. We took a
four day getaway while our two sons stayed with the King and Queen of Yes (aka:
my in-laws). It was there we stole
extra kisses, drank lots of coffee and bought this sign that now resides in our
bathroom, “I love you not because you’re perfect but because you’re perfect for
me.”
As imperfect as we are, I love
my husband and I know my husband loves me.
My beloved is mine and I am
his… Song of Solomon 2:16a (New International Version)
What is one way you can show
your husband love? If you’re not
married, what’s one way you can show love and be kind to yourself?
Thanks for letting me write some joy, some struggles and the joy in struggles here, Trisha. I pray those who are married find they're not alone and encouraged today! :-)
ReplyDeleteTHIS IS VERY INSPIRING! Thank you for sharing this. It has reminded me to keep it going, don't take things for granted or eventually 'it' dies. marie
ReplyDeleteThank you, I needed that!
ReplyDeleteThank you, I needed that!
ReplyDeleteso touching! thank you for the wonderful read. with five young children, we are definitely "business partners" right now and that must change!
ReplyDeleteOh, so true! I'm in the comfortable phase, and I need to remember that is really IS the small things that make a marriage what it should be - filled with love.
ReplyDeleteThis is an awesome & much needed post :) I love Chuck Swindol & I've read the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Love that book! anyway, thanks for sharing this & it's so true we get so comfortable with doing nothing, when we should be sooo comfortable doing somethings! Love is wonderful if it's cared for deeply.
ReplyDeleteI love this post, I remember when we were first married Dennis would always kiss me good morning as he left early for work and I still slept. Think I might remind him of that tonight. All those little things do mean a lot.
ReplyDelete