Summer fun, vacations, pool time, BBQ's, lazy days are coming to an end here at the Novotny home, as we begin counting down the days until school starts. And this mom is making her Fall goals.One of my family goals this fall is to date my kids more - to spend more individualized time with each child which is not always an easy task with 5 kids.
Why Date your kids? It allows you time to connect with them with out the interruptions of the other family members. It allows you to focus on one child at a time and gives them the ability to connect with you knowing they have 100% of your attention. It allows you the ability to invest and inscribe into their lives your value system. It allows you to not just say you love them but to show it in action.
Will you join me and make it a goal this fall to date your kids?
Steps to Dating your kids:
Step #1 List - Make a list of date ideas for each of your kids. Ask them about things they would like to do with you. This could be as simple as a hike or trip to the ice cream parlor.
Step #2 Action - Put your kid dates on your calendar now. If you don't plan- it won't happen.
Step #3 Prepare - Make arrangements to have a successful date.
- Arrange for your other children to be taken care of ( dad or baby sitters).
- If you are going to dinner make reservations.
- If you are attending an event , purchase tickets.
- Invite your child, some children need to know the plan ahead of time.
Step #4 Engage- Create conversation by asking them open ended questions about them. Don't spend all your time talking, take time to listen to them. Ask them about their interest, opionins, fears, goals and dreams.
Be there for your kids by making memories with one on one dates. The kind of time they will remember that you have invested in them.
I have heard of this idea before and even planned on doing this with our 2 children.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with having to put it on the calendar. I believe this is the reason we haven't implemented this yet.
With school starting next week I think it is time for us to add this to the calendar.
Do you have any recommendations on how frequently you should date each child?
I actually do "date my kids". We have a great time and it's such a special thing to have one-on-one time with them. I actually blogged about a couple of my dates recently.
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I hope more people do it!
My husband and I talk about doing this and know the value. We've done it a little.
ReplyDeleteI don't know why I didn't think of the calendar idea. This should help us make it happen more often. Thanks for the reminder. Our three kids thank you too!
I have 3 kids, and have done this with each of them....and love it! It does not have to be done often, and can be combined with things that need to be done - and still work out great. For example, I only did it once with each of my kids this past summer, but each are still talking about it. For my teenager, I made our date a day out at the mall school shopping and then lunch where he chose. He loved it, we had a great time, and I got a task off my list :) Its the point of making the day about just you and that child connecting. I highly recommend it :)
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